What nervousness is

To me it can be most accurately described as a pit. A hole somewhere beneath the center that can drag everything else down into it, shitting out whatever whenever it deems itself ready or so full that everything must go. If you are lucky you get brilliance and maybe some kind of insight to the external world. Most often times it just leads to picking and scratching. Anxious twitches. Sleepless nights in blinding darkness with a cat named Underworld Dreams. Gum chewing. At worst self and interpersonal destruction. In the gut of this pit is a little man who screams at you about wasting your time and his. He is hungry. And he can't live off what you're feeding him. If you listen closely, if you listen hard enough and pay real close attention he'll tell you what he needs. But it's never explicit. Or maybe it is but you just don't have the wherewithal to acquire that specific need - because he won't die; so you figure it's okay to keep giving him novels and records, historically accurate and socially conscious documentaries, soy products, a gym membership. He'll shut up for a little bit, doesn't talk with his mouth full. By now you've figured out you have two choices; you can keep consuming and scratching, or you can stop and listen and figure out what it is you can do for yourself to get a decent night's sleep.